Dumpster Diving With The Best Of Them

"Did the butter get thrown out too?"

Dad looked pained. "Look in the freezer. It should be in there."

It wasn't.

This is not a tale of butter that mysteriously disappeared. This is instead a story of combining households and generations and lifestyles.

My brother Mark and his wife Jackie are selling their home and moving into my dad's house, the one we moved into in 1970 and in which he continues to live today, first with his shrinking family, then with my mother, and. finally, after she moved into memory care last November, by himself. Mark and Jackie recently hit a financial wall, not of their own doing, that, as they each characterized it, was the straw that broke the camel's back, the camel in this case being their ability to make their mortgage payment and pay their bills and pay for Jackie's medical insurance, as the just announced cut to her hours eliminated her employer-paid health insurance. It was the insurance that was the last straw; given Jackie's health issues, "going without insurance" is not an option. So they made the difficult but solid decision to sell their house while they are on the upside of their mortgage and move into the old home place. (Back in 2018, I interviewed Mark and Jackie about their grocery budget given the money issues and the health issues.) With Dad a month away from turning 86, still in good health but, as he puts it, old, I think we are all, starting with Dad, relieved that he will no longer be living alone.

The house is large; Mark and Jackie will take over the upstairs, all three will share the kitchen and the bathroom. As a major part of that move, both households are downsizing. Jackie, Mark, and a crew of loyal neighbors are deep-cleaning Dad's house for the first time in...ten years? Twenty? Since 1970?

Don't get me wrong. Dad and Mom did not keep a dirty house. But Mom's ability to do housework disappeared years ago due to physical limitations, and Dad's ability to keep up with everything diminished as he aged and as Mom took more and more of his time. You wouldn't walk into the house ever and notice anything much more than dusty shelves and accumulated clutter on the counters and surfaces, but as Mark and Jackie prepare the house for their move, their hard efforts are showing just how much dust and dirt and grime had accumulated over almost 50 years.

So back to the butter. One of the tasks Jackie undertook yesterday was cleaning Dad's refrigerator for the first time in...a long time. Again, nothing was filthy and there was no spoiled food, but..yeah, it was overdue. Jackie scrubbed shelves, she wiped down bottles and containers, and when she found items that were past their pull date, she pulled them.

Note: Jackie's mother, Judy, was an RN. Jackie can and does wash her hands with more attention than most of us ever even think of doing. Judy taught Jackie well about food safety, about keeping surfaces (counters, sinks, refrigerators) clean, about safe food preparation. Those early life lessons have served Jackie and her husband and children well over the years. Those lessons also include paying scrupulous attention to pull dates and "use by" dates.

Second Note: Dad was not raised by an RN. Neither was I. Dad, in fact, lived his early years without electricity, without running water, without refrigeration. You get the point. I, of course, grew up with electricity, running water, and refrigeration, but believe that food is more durable than what we give it credit for, especially non-perishable items and items kept frozen. I also believe strongly that "use by" dates are, for the most part, something foisted on us by food manufacturers (note my word choice: manufacturers—we eat manufactured food in this country! ) who want us to continually be buying their food items "fresh" (like a can has a "freshness" quality to it). So while Dad and I talked this morning about the butter, he talked about how his family prepared and kept food when he was growing up and how that butter in the freezer would keep 20 years.

So where was the butter? When I quizzed my brother when he and Jackie showed up later, he said "probably in one of those trash bags near the top of the trash container." (We were already outside, near the big trash tote.)

I didn't miss a beat. I popped open the lid, opened the bag closest to the top (the contents of which were still cool), and rummaged around. First up was a never-opened bag of pecan halves. Score! Next were the two pounds of butter, still cold. Score!

Jackie, who was out of the porch cleaning something, called over, laughing. "I can buy you butter, April! And I'm not eating at your house!" I called back, "You can't eat butter anyway, you're lactose intolerant!"

I took my finds inside to show Dad, who grinned. He was happy. Mark, knowing the vast gulf on food that separate me and Jackie, laughed.

When Jackie came back in the house, we both stood in front of the built-in cabinets in which Mom had kept baking items and spices. I looked at her: "You opened this yet?" Jackie shook her head.

We opened the doors. It was a hodgepodge of things: some boxed mixes (Mom was truly a bride of the early 1950s; convenience food was what everyone used and she never really gave up that habit), an empty plastic container, and a somewhat full canister. (I opened that one: powdered sugar.) There was an unopened box of corn starch, an old opened box of baking soda, and an opened container of petrified baking powder. There was a whole drawer of spices, some of which, as I looked closer, probably predated my parents moving into the house 49 years ago.

Oh my.

"Let me just take these all," I said, grabbing some grocery sacks. I dumped the items we knew were past redemption: the petrified baking powder, the old soda. But the rest?

"I'll sort them out when I get home."

We bagged it all. I put the butter and the pecan halves into the bags as well, hugged Dad, and left.

The snazzy Tupperware container is on the left, the Jiffy mix is on the right

When I got home to Warren, I was excited. "Guess what I found! The butter! Guess what else I found! Come look!"

Warren dutifully looked. I then spread my treasures on the table and went through what I had brought home. I kept the powdered sugar, both in the canister (a cool circa 1970 Tupperware model) and an unopened bag of the same. The regular sugar made the cut. I kept the mixes—brownies, lemon bars, pumpkin spice cookies—because I sometimes bake for other occasions where a box mix is not the end of the world. I even kept the Jiffy Corn Muffin Mix, which, until I was well into my teens, constituted the only "cornbread" I really ever ate, with the rare exception of Kentucky cornbread. (I was an adult before I realized the sweet stuff was considered "corncake" and the Kentucky stuff, unsweetened, was truly the cornbread. I still sweeten mine, but not as much as I did in younger days.)

t took me about 15 minutes to sort the spices, opening each one and smelling and tasting them. Nine of them I emptied and recycled the containers. 12 of them I kept.

The pecans? I'm about to start making pesto, and I use pecans in my pesto to thicken it. We just yesterday bought pecan halves at Aldi, where they run .529 cents an ounce, the cheapest in town. That six ounce bag I rescued? $3.17 worth of pecans at that price.

Sweet.

The butter went, of course, in the freezer. I texted Jackie a photo of it.

Fortunately, I am married to a man who gets me and shares my attitude towards food and towards food durability. He even smiled about the Jiffy mix: it's not anything we would ever buy, but what the heck, might as eat it up.

A little dumpster diving goes a long way.

The butter in its new home, our freezer